Blogging about your relationship is interesting when you’re in the process of a life change. It seems like I should have the answers, right? Like I’ve already figured everything out.
That’s what I have to say to that concept. I am so far from figuring everything out.
At times, like right now, I feel an unbelievable amount of pressure to have all the answers. How to be a loving stepmom. How to be a support system for Brandon. How to spend more time with my friends and family. How to create a business that I’m proud of. How to be present and worry less.
All these things feel heavy and at any given moment, I feel like I’m failing at some aspect. Sometimes I feel like I’m failing at all of them all at the same time.
I don’t have the answers today. And I probably won’t have them next week either. But I’m working hard to figure it all out. And the light at the end of the tunnel is when I can share the outcome with you. I’m hyperaware that I am not the only one who feels this way. We all feel this way from time to time. But most people only share their challenges after they overcome them. After the transformation. After they’ve found success. And it makes sense, right? I mean, really: who wants to share their lives when they don’t have things figured out yet? It’s a vulnerable place to let people in because: what if you never figure it out? What if people hold you accountable and then you give up? You never get there?
But on the flip side, if you have the confidence that you’re going to put in the work to make a change, wouldn’t it be a beautiful process to watch someone’s evolution? Wouldn’t this part of the journey be the most valuable?
So today, things don’t feel so good. In fact, they feel pretty crummy. And as much as I don’t feel like writing this or hitting publish, I’m certain this is a valuable part of my journey.
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